Wed Night AA Riverside Men's Group

This isn't one of my usual posts. Rather I wanted to share, get off my chest, some things I've been going through. 2017 has been a difficult year for me. It started with my biggest client demanding I cut back my hours and drastically reduce my billing hours. My second biggest client had to be honest with me and admit he wasn't in a position to continue using my services at all. So just like that, my financial prospects took a nose dive in the first few months. On top of that, two month's ago my step father became seriously ill. He ended up requiring a colostomy, a serious surgery, which has completely changed their outlook for quality of life over the next few years. Because I still live in their home, I depended a great deal on them for financial security. It sucks knowing that rather than being an asset to them, I am a liability. In sobriety, I've never known much financial freedom. Although I studied architecture & engineering in college, I failed to g...

Good evening folks,  What's that old saying? Better late than never? I had some excuses prepared but I figure I better save them for when I might need them!! This week, we'll be reading  Empty on the Inside p512-521.  BTW, someone mentioned to me they weren't finding the stories in the book so please take note that we're on the 4th Edition of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous. The 3rd edition has a different set of stories (some are the same but some aren't).  Anyways, I just got done reading this story and I liked it quite a bit. You could say this speaker had one of those Spiritual Awakenings of the "Educational variety". Sometimes I think that phrase might be a euphemism for "they were kind of  slow  to get it" lol Mind you, between the time I first came to AA and that moment when I had what you might call a spiritual awakening of my own, 5 years had gone by.... Now who is the slow one!!??      It's good to rememb...

Good evening Folks, This week we will be reading & discussing  Gutter Bravado p501-511.   One of the great joys of my life is hosting this Wednesday night meeting of which I've had the privileged to serve for some time now. So it gives me a great sense of satisfaction whenever I hear someone, especially a new comer, say that there is  something  special about our meeting. To me it means that the same  something-ness  with which I fell in love with is still there.  Last week, Fred brought up an article originally written in the July 1976 issue of "24 Magazine". In the article, the unknown author compares the quality of someone's AA program to Strong/Medium/Week Coffee.  See the article here:  http://www. barefootsworld.net/ aagreshamslaw.html  It's a bit long but well worth the read (kind of like my e-mails!! lol).  Basically it describes how the rapid growth of AA in the early 40's created a situation in which y...

Hello everyone,  This is your weekly reminder of this week's meeting. We will be reading  A Vision of Recovery p494-500   of the book Alcoholic Anonymous. Please find below, after the message, all of the pertinent info about the where & when. A big thanks to last week's speaker Ralph T. who gave us an excellent overview on what it was like, what happened and what it's like now! A few weeks back, I heard a really excellent share by  Scott T. from Coldbrook, NY . This guy went from being tossed in jailed multiple times to being invited to speak at the White House - and he had a (poorly chosen) sponsor from the Quincy Bay Group in Boston named Fred who smoked pot!! - (not THAT Fred!!) Anyways, he said something that really put it's spikes in my mind and made lots of sense to me. What he said is, and i'm paraphrasing here, that being an AA member, even one sober for some years, doesn't make anyone of us into an expert or an authority on the mat...

My Sponsor sent me the following link the other day: http://www.barefootsworld.net/ aagreshamslaw.html It was an excellent read!!  I believe myself to have started out with medium-coffee and gradually moved toward strong-coffee. So I know full well that he's right when he says that not applying the full measure of the program, in the best case, only got me abstinence and, in the worst case (as happened to me before), instead of graduating to strong-coffee I could've slipped back into active alcoholism. Thankfully my sponsor likes his coffee BLACK!!! lol I'd be willing to bet that there is a strong correlation in group size and the strength of their "coffee". Larger groups tend to dilute the message a lot in hopes of avoiding controversy. I tried going to a 100+ AA group in Miami (The Coral Group) and couldn't find sobriety there (that's where I had the sponsor who had me call him every single day and NEVER ONCE picked up the phone).  Smal...

Good evening gents,  Just your weekly reminder for this week's Wednesday night AA meeting. This is the last Wednesday of the month which means we will be having a  Speaker Meeting.   Curious side note about the month of May this year, it has both 5 Mondays & 5 Sundays. According to the  not-at-all  dubious website where I read this, this only happens once every 800 years!! That kinda got me thinking about the opportunities we're given in this life. God knows I've squandered my share and sometimes it weighs on me. Great nuggets of wisdom on this topic are easy to find; When God closes a door he opens a window, There is no Yesterday or Tomorrow - There is only Today, Let Go and Let God or Be Dragged.... etc,etc,etc... Those are all true and all good but sometimes the past (and it's wreckage) can seem to follow you around like a dark cloud and it feels like we'll never get out from under it.  When I find myself in that situation, I fi...

Hello friends,  This week we will be reading  On the Move p486-493  from the book Alcoholic Anonymous.  I just heard an excellent speaker tape last week by a speaker named Scott T. from Coldbrook, NY. If you know how to look up speaker tapes I highly recommend this speaker. One of the highlights of the share was that he read out a poem I'd like to share with you called The Man in the Glass.   The Man in the Glass When you get what you want in your struggle for self And the world makes you king for a day, Just go to the mirror and look at yourself, And see what that man has to say.  For it isn't your father or mother or wife, Whose judgment upon you must pass; The fellow whose verdict counts most in your life Is the one starring back from the glass.  He's the fellow to please, never mind all the rest. For he's with you clear up 'til the end, And you've passed the most dangerous, difficult test If the man in the glass is your friend....

Good evening everyone,  This week we will dive into  Building a New Life p476-485.  Speaking of building a new life... Many of us just got back from the convention in Manuel Antonio and it was truly excellent!!  Myself, I met some new friends and strengthened my friendship with old ones. I heard some amazing stories and listened to some great shares that resounded deep in my soul, making me want to look deeper into my self and my work with the program.  I remember being told that staying sober is done one day at a time, this holds true whether you've got 24 hrs or 40+ years - all any of us have is today. But also, that we are embarked on a lifetime journey of spiritual growth that never ends.  Like many other things in the program, I remember feeling like there was a contradiction  hidden   somewhere in between the lines - there isn't.  Of course, if it were up to me we'd have nothing bu...

Good evening folks, First of all I want to thank Alex Go. for sharing last week, and volunteering no less, it was a n excellent share and we thank you for your service! This week we will be going through  Twice Gifted p470-475  in the big book.  Last week, my buddy Clive T. brought Dr.Bob's version of the Third Step Prayer for us to close with, which is copied down below if you're interested. It reminded me of a time when I was fresh out of rehab, still knee deep in denial about how futile fighting this disease is and yet fully aware something was wrong with me. I had been sober maybe 38 days (30 of which were in the rehab) and I decided to take a summer college course that went on a 30-day overseas field trip, what could go wrong? I lasted about 24 hrs before I had my first beer with the group and the remaining 29-days was pure misery. Everyday praying no one would order that first drink, struggling my hardest to control that urge, eventually givin...

Good evening gents,  This week we will be having our end of month  Speaker Meeting.  It's still not too late to volunteer if you'd like to share, although, we sure would enjoy volunteering you for you!!  Anyways, I'm not really feeling much inspired to write today... I'm just cruising on through to the end of my day feeling grateful to be alive, counting my blessings and giving thanks.  Happy 24hrs, David t.

Good afternoon guys, This week we'll be reading  Listening to the Wind p458-469.  I just finished reading it and it's a fascinating story.  Without any details, two things immediately popped out at me:  If this woman -who was a self proclaimed "drunken hooker" and wore the same dirty clothes for days on end- was able to find men willing to marry her and throw riches her way at the snap of her fingers.... She must be freakin' smoking hot!! How she continually went through horrors that others would of called rock bottom and kept going, it points out to me how  insensitive we   alcoholics are to those we hurt. I'm sure we could all be accused of this to varying degrees. As a result of these two ideas -I'll let you be the judge of which was truly the highest motivating factor here- I tried investigating the author to find out more about her. I found this page about the  Authors of the AA stories   but to my disappointment th...

Good afternoon gents, I feel like today is Monday for some reason, long weekends throw off my schedule a bit. But like a wise man said, "you are disturbed because you are disturbable".  This week we'll be reviewing  Safe Haven p452-457.  Last week, something intriguing was mentioned during the meeting about a letter Dr. Carl Jung wrote in reply to Bill Wilson. My friend Alex G. was found the letter and wanted me to share it with everyone. I've attached two versions of the same letter, one is in a much easier to read format (bigger letters) and the other is a picture of the original letter from the AA Archives (for the sentimental types among us).   Some of you may not know this bit of AA history or need a refresher like I did. So, a s you read the attached letter, here are a few things to  keep in mind: In 1930, Dr. Carl Jung treated an american businessman by the name of Rowland Hazard. Dr. Freud, who was Rowland's first choice, had  previou...

Good afternoon everyone!  I am getting an early start on the e-mail today so you know what that means... it's a slow Monday!! First, I wanted to thank our speaker from last week Alex G. for his excellent share. Alex gave an awesome share all while getting through jetlag and a traveler's cold -- that's going to any length baby!! This week we'll be diving into  He Lived Only to Drink p446-451 . I can already relate with just the title!! One thing I like about this last group of stories (Part III: They Lost Nearly All) is that even though these guys went about as low as you can go and although it can be hard to relate, not having experienced skid row or the likes myself, their  complete psychic change  ( ie : spiritual awakening) is so excessively clear that it gives me a strong sense of hope for my own life. When you're sleeping under a cardboard box over a hot air vent to keep from freezing one day and are on the AA general services board the n...

Hi, I hope everyone had as great an Easter week as I did!! Just to remind everyone this Wednesday night is a  Speaker meeting  so no reading is required. I spent a couple of days getting to know Nicaragua and it's people and it was very interesting. I saw some beautiful things but I also saw some things that made me really sad. It's so easy to take the little things for granted like being able to read & write and putting food in your belly. I came back with a renewed sense of gratitude for living in Costa Rica and the opportunities ordinary citizens here have to make a living regardless of political or social affiliation. Oh sure, this ain't no Utopia... but neither is anywhere else. We've got our cliques and our issues just like anyone else but when all is said and done... Life in Costa Rica is Good!! Happy 24hrs, David t.

Good evening everyone, Just wanted to send out a quick email and let everyone know that there will be a meeting this wednesday even though it is Semana Santa. We will be reading  My Bottle, My Resentments, and Me p437-445.  I would ask one favor because I am heading out for Nicaragua that very night at 11pm if we could all please arrive punctually so we can close a bit early I'd appreciate it (I know, I'm talking to alcoholics, it's a lost cause.... lol)    Let me know if you can make it please! Best Regards, David t

Good evening everyone, This week we'll be reading  Window of Opportunity p421-436 . This fellow's story is one of those self-admittedly short drinking careers gone awry. Most took far longer, with far more consequences, to realize they had a problem. However, when he talks about his behavior while under the influence, there is no denying his qualifications as an alcoholic. It's a very interesting story and it reminded me of how important it is to  identify  rather than to  compare. When remembering the times where I actively made the effort to  compare  my story and find how I was different, what I was actually doing was trying to shield myself from anything that could challenge my carefully constructed wall of denial. It was a hateful thing inside me causing this conscious separation of self from others  - The Ego.  When I was finally ready to  identify ,  I had given up struggling with the question, I admitted I had a problem and b...

Dear O, I realize I'm writing this email somewhat out of the blue but I didn't get a chance to give any feedback yesterday at the noon speaker meeting during which you said  "I wouldn't go so far as to call myself recovered.... Next thing you know I'd be one of those guys saying I stopped going to meetings and went back out again..."  (or at least, that's what I Heard). I gotta be honest I was taken by surprise by that and felt a somewhat attacked by it. Obviously, you know where I got the idea from, my sponsor, but I wanted a chance to explain why  I  say it. What had happened to me after my relapse was a total implosion of my self-confidence. I had been doing half-measures and getting nowhere. Not only that but on the outside, things seemed to be getting worse; divorce, bankruptcy and family conflict - these were the payments I was making for clearing away parts of the wreckage of my past and I was miserable. Then the thought came to me, what t...

Hello everyone, This week we'll be reading  Acceptance was the Answer p407-420 . This is a story about a doctor's drug & alcohol abuse and he's got some friggin' fantastic one liners in there. Now I don't want to ruin the story for you but just one quick example, he says he  "found it hard to practice good medicine while shooting morphine"  - I would have never of guessed!! lol He also says " I never in my life took a tranquilizer, sedative, or pep pill because I was a pill-head. I always took it because I had the symptom that only that pill would relieve."   It's like Clancy I. said, what we have is a disease of perception. I tend to believe anything that is born of my own mind - see I thought it so it  must  be true! But if I can accept that my disease centers in the mind and not the body, that my perception can be skewed by things like fear, denial and my own self-esteem, then maybe the person I think I am is not the person others...

Hi everyone, My apologies on sending this out late this week, I've been battling a little bit of a cold lately. Anywho, I'd like to thank Dave W. for sharing his excellent story with us last week, nothing helps recovery along like a heavy dose of humor & depravity and Jesus Dave delivered in spades!! Also I'd like to remind everyone of the upcoming AA convention in Manuel Antonio that's taking place from May 6-8th. We're still working on the details of organizing our group to get out there but let me know if your interested and go online to  register now  -  It's FREE!!  (to register anyways, you pay later!!) This week we'll be reading  A Drunk, like You p398-406 . This was the first time for me reading it and I got a lot out of it. Aside from the fact that I always love listening to another  Member of the Tribe  breaking barriers by showing that alcoholism is no respecter of race, religion or creed, proving you  jew *i mean too*  ...

Good evening everyone, So tonight I join the ranks of all those who've ever come to the meeting having skipped ahead or having read the wrong section... I just spent 30 mins reading only to find out this week we have a Speaker meeting!!! Doh!!! Oh Well, no big deal, means I'm all caught up for next week - plus I loved that story but I'll save my comments for next week! This week, we will have a speaker meeting chosen randomly (unless we have any volunteers ).  Last week it was mentioned a few times from several members what they get or don't get from reading the stories in the back of the Big Book. One of the things I've always felt about stories, even more so with speaker meetings, is that the difference between the first 164 pages and the stories is somewhat like the difference between reading a how-to manual and watching some one do it. Now it can be  very  useful to see how someone does something you've never done before, but despite all the macho bra...